Monday, March 20, 2006

'The Apprentice 5' - Ep. 4 -or- "Aw, Grape-Nuts! Only TRUE Leader Fired!"

Well, well, well ... it's about time. But, I'm getting ahead of myself, aren't I?

As the show opens, the candidates are worried. Tarek knows one more time in the boardroom could be his last time. Charmaine bursts into tears and climbs in bed when she's told that Trump wanted to know why she wasn't called into the boardroom. After all, it was she who secured the lewd comedian and then paid said lewd comedian the full amount. It was she who should have been fired. Oh, woe is me! Everybody's worried except "What? Me Worry?" Brent. After all, why should he worry? He's done nothing wrong.

The two teams are summoned to the Trump Tower Bar and Grill where they learn their next task will be to create a billboard touting Post cereal's new product -- Post Grape-Nuts Trail Mix Crunch. (My own advice would be that the name of the cereal is too long, but I wasn't consulted. What exactly is a "grape-nut" anyway? I don't think I want my grapes to have nuts. But, I digress.) Carolyn is absent this week and it's the posing pretty progeny Ivanka Trump along with George who'll be looking in on the teams' progress.

And, so it starts ... Tammy stepped up to be the project manager for Synergy and Brent immediately volunteered his expertise in presenting to the executives. Oy! She tried to politely tell him it was a healthy product and that she didn't think he was best suited to present it -- plus, he messes everything up and he's an embarrassment to the team. No, she didn't say the latter to him, just on camera and with the others. She made him in charge of selecting the clothes. Now, there's an important task. Brent may be batty, but he isn't stupid. He also thinks she called him "fat" when she actually didn't go that far at all. Ivanka peeked in and immediately made the Brent plan -- don't let him touch anything important to the task.

When the commercial break ended and the show intro was just a "Keep it Simple, Stupid" logo, the good ol' KISS Theory, it was a dead giveaway that one team would overdo things. Ah, but which team?

Over at Gold Rush, Charmaine took on the project manager role in hopes to redeem herself from last week's faux pas. Now, watching her, I have to say she did very well. She solicited ideas from all and decided a "less is more" approach is best as folks don't really pause to read billboards -- something should just jump out at them and make a quick impression. (See the KISS Theory.) Oh, and now it's easy to figure which team will win, isn't it? Bryce came up with the idea of someone chugging cereal because "it's just that good!" The team went off looking for a healthy All American girl for the photo shoot.

Meanwhile, Synergy is in flux. They have way too much going on! Their graphics and pictures don't line up. They decided to go with a "new generation" of cereal theme, hiring what they presumed to be an older man with someone they thought looked like a daughter. The guy was nowhere near old enough looking to be her father! Eek! And, then the graphics were all over the place.

Task completed, the teams went off to New Jersey early the next morning to meet the Post people. Well, one team went early. The other team waited for a Brent Without Pants to iron and get ready. They were a good half hour behind. Once there, both billboards actually looked pretty good, but the chugging cereal was the obvious winner -- clear, concise, exactly the right model for the shot and a quick glance would convey the idea. Synergy's next generation just had much too much going on. In the presentations, Synergy's Sean got tongue-tied and blew it. Two strikes. Gold Rush wins.

The reward for Gold Rush didn't seem all that to me, but the team seemed to enjoy it. They got a chance to go cook with Chef Jean-Georges, the world acclaimed chef at the Trump Tower. Lenny was a bit embarrassing, but it looked like they all had a good time and quite the feast. The team sang the praises of Charmaine's leadership. She is redeemed.

And it's to the Boardroom for Synergy! Woohoo!

The team so wants Brent gone. Since they didn't give him any real responsibility, they don't think it's going to happen. They think Tammy may be blamed as project manager, Sean blamed as he blew the presentation or Andrea because she was the one responsible for the too-busy graphics. Of course, Brent is confident: "Save my seat here (at hotel). I will be back stronger and more powerful than ever! Keep me out of the boardroom or you'll be sorry!" Yipes. He's reminding me of the old Twilight Zone episode with the talking doll that killed Telly Savalas and then told his wife, "If you're not nice to me, I'll kill you too!"

The Boardroom never got to its second stage. Brent proved himself a liability, an embarrassment and probably a bit of a fool. Tammy didn't have to choose to take anyone into the Boardroom at all. It never got that far. With the full team there bickering mostly about Brent, Trump hit his Brent Limit.

"Brent, you're fired. Out! Over! Go! GO!"

It's about time.

Dollar bills, y'all...

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