Monday, June 12, 2006

'Hell's Kitchen' Season Premiere -or- "There Are Muppets In My Kitchen!"

Hell's Kitchen
I enjoy cooking. I enjoy baking. Folks seem to enjoy eating food I prepare. But, do I want to be a chef? Or, more specifically, do I want to go through literal hell at the hands of Chef Gordon Ramsay of Hell's Kitchen?

No way! This guy is brutal. He makes my own micro-managing boss look like an angel. And, of course, when you're talking kitchens, there are weapons there -- knives, forks, and hot stoves, oh my!

I watched this show last season mainly because there wasn't anything else which interested me in the time slot. I ended up getting hooked on the show. So, here I am.

Tonight's season premiere was less of the touted two-hour special than it was two episodes shown one after the other. The events occurring were obviously two separate shows, not one grand ol' cookin' fest. But it did the trick for me on a quiet Monday night (as well as making me feel a bit better about my own boss).

This season, the 12 contestants have been broken down by gender to two teams of six each. I'm not huge on the gender war mentality in the reality television genre, but it seems like every show goes that route if it lasts more than a season. So be it. The men are the Blue Team; the women are the Red Team. Pink obviously is too fluffy and soft for Ramsay, I'd say.

Even though I watched the two hours, I still don't have too many of the contestants down. I'm impressed with Heather -- she knows what she's doing, severely burnt her hand in the second hour yet kept giving her team direction and says things like "We do not speak in the kitchen." I'll remember that. I will only dance and hum while in my kitchen.

Others I noticed on the Red Team included Polly, way out of her league and gone in the first hour. Being a mom of six puts you through a lot but doesn't mean you can make it in Hell's Kitchen. There's a Sara who just struck me as rather odd. No one really stood out as being a possible winner other than Heather. We'll see. If we're going to play gender war, I want a woman winner!
Gordon Ramsay

The Blue Team has its share of oddballs, too. There's a prison cook who was a prisoner. Eep. There's a young guy named Giacomo who started off very impressively, then screwed up the side dishes in the second hour and was nominated for elimination. I wanted to like him after the first hour, but now I'm not so sure.

One of the men I know I don't care for is this fellow Tom. He sweats in the food and looks more suited to be a character actor who'd be hanging out at an off-track betting parlor than someone I'd want fixing my dinner. He was nominated for elimination in the second hour, but Ramsay saved him and wanted a different person in his place. That person, Gabe, a lost sheep, was eliminated when put up with Giacomo.

They managed to have not one, but two medical emergencies in tonight's premiere. One of the men (Larry) went to the hospital as his "body shut down due to stress." Hey, they said it, not me. He, like Gabe, was a lost sheep. He was way out of his element and he should be happy the stress nailed him in the beginning or his head would have exploded or something.

The service? Well, I hope they don't charge the customers at Hell's Kitchen, not this early in the show, anyway. I can't imagine waiting two hours for my appetizers or more than three for my entree. Yikes! On both nights they served (two shows, I tell you!), the customers ended up walking out and very few tables were served. I don't believe any tables received their entrees the first night.

The best lines of the night:
  • Gordon Ramsay: "I've got Muppets in my kitchen!"
  • "We've got a runner!" - one of the contestants upon discovering Larry had gone missing.

The most disgusting part of the night? It's a toss-up between Gordon Ramsay making the contestants pull all the discarded (wasted) food from the first night out of the Dumpster and the who can sweat the most contest between Tom and Keith. I'm sorry, but I don't want people who sweat like fountains near my food. I don't sweat in my own food and I'd leave a restaurant if I saw someone like that.

As I mentioned, in the first hour Polly was eliminated. I agree with that one. As for the men, I personally thought Keith who couldn't even take orders and sweated all over the place should have gone. Yes, Gabe wouldn't have lasted much longer, but at least he didn't disgust me. He was clean and neat.

So, what did I learn from the show? Hmmm...don't sweat in the food. Don't overcook the pasta. Keep my side dishes and meat timed to arrive at the same time. Oh, and the most important thing, don't become a chef for anyone, especially Gordon Ramsay.

Burn baby, burn...


Famyates(Sharon) said...

Hey Jackie........well here it is,the summer entertainment??? I cannot believe how mean and nasty this guy is. His food must be fit for God and the angels,he has such a high standard. I would have hit him with a frying pan if he had gone after me like he did some of these sheep......oops,sorry,chefs!
And is it me,but are these people woefully underqualified to be there?? I don't care if they have had "some" formal training,these people do not know their butts from a pumpkin risotto!! And the sweating guys,especially disgusting is that!!I can't see any of them winning with this guy,but as you said,maybe Heather and Giacamo have the slimmest chance. The funniest thing....he's even mean and nasty to the CUSTOMERS!!!!!!

auntlisa said...

Hey Jackie, how did you know this was on for 2 hrs last nite? It was listed as the premiere at 9pm but when I tuned in I see a recap of the lst episode. Oh well, at least there was that. Thanks for clearing up the confusion.

Anonymous said...

Hey! I only watched a little bit of the show. For some reason Chef Ramsey just rubs me the wrong way. LOL

Are you going to watch Treasure Hunters? It looks a bit like Amazing Race but the teams start off at different starting points instead of all together. Looks interesting to me. But then again I like those kind of shows compared to Bachelor or Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire. I just don't understand people who go on tv to find their 'true love'. LOL