'American Idol 6' - The Minneapolis Auditions

It's back! Yes, one of my favorite junk food for the mind shows... American Idol. From the cheesiness to the real talents to the stunned expression on Randy's face to Simon's um... Simonisms.

Right now my current plans are to write about the auditions. Then, once the finalists are in place, East Coast Updates will be posted on boot nights in addition to entries about the show. So, if you're an American Idol fan, you're right where you should be. All opinions are welcome in the comments even if you disagree with me, but I ask that all remains civil. Onto the show...

Tonight was the first time the show has held auditions in Minneapolis and they picked up 17 who will go onto Hollywood. But, hey... it's the auditions. At this point the show is more about the losers than the winners, right? Alas, although there were some odd ducks and some who lacked any kind of voice or stage presence at all, I didn't see any who would go the road of the Classic Idol Rejects. You know, folks like William Hung or even Crazy Dave.

Sitting in on the judges panel with no explanation why (or maybe I missed it) was Jewel. She fit right in, though. The most notable line of hers for me was when an Army Reserves woman was auditioning and told Simon she loved his personality. "You have to go through boot camp before you can enjoy Simon's personality." Not bad, not bad.

Tonight's Most Notable of the Odd

Charles Moody, age 26, from Brooklyn, New York. He dressed as Apollo Creed and sang opera. Actually, the opera wasn't done extremely horribly, but the overall package was so not American Idol that it was hysterical. According to Simon, "You're singing opera dressed as Apollo Creed wearing a funny hat."

A young man named Jesse Holloway talked forever in a monotone before singing. But once he started singing, I wished he had just kept talking. He left in the middle of his audition for water, came back singing even worse. Then he blew up in the hallway - "They [the judges] ought to be fired!" The noive, I say!

Oh... and speaking of "the noive" -- now, I didn't catch her name, but one young woman's whole singing style revolved around evoking the ghost of the Cowardly Lion from The Wizard of Oz. Yes, I wouldn't lie. Her song was "If I Were King of the Forest" and in later clips she used the style in normal songs. Yikes.

There was a cowboy-outfit dude named Matthew Volna who looked like Henry Winkler (recent, not as Fonzie) and sang like Ben Stein in a lower octave. He performed - and I use the word loosely unless it was a comedy act... wait, even then... - "Folsom Prison Blues." Poor Johnny Cash. It's a good thing he's not around to hear that version. In reference to his music selection, he told the judges, "I can't sing that other stuff." "You can't sing that!"

Troy Benham describes himself as Urban Amish. He's never seen the show, doesn't watch television, doesn't listen to modern music... or so he says.

I personally think it was all an act. He "sang" some weird not memorable song which he said he had written. I don't fall for the Amish act at all. The hair is wrong, the sunglasses are wrong, Troy Benham is wrong.

Next!

There were temper tantrums and too many young kids whose parents let them go to the auditions when they should have told them not to make fools of themselves. There was a Number One Fan whose voice could herd cats. "Is there anything I can do to improve, Simon?" "Yes, leave."

Stephen Horst, a voice coach, thought he had it made. Nope. Simon instigated problems between Randy and Stephen. There was one young woman whose boss flew her to the audition after she didn't make the cut in Pasadena. She didn't make it in Minneapolis, either. (I guess if you can't make it in Pasadena, you can't make it anywhere.)

Jason Anderson is a 16-year old boy who believes he's a talented juggler, dancer, and singer. Um... none of the above.

Simon to Jason: "You sum up Minneapolis, useless at everything. Your future involves not singing." [Yeah, I thought that first line was a bit harsh on a kid. But, true.]

Jason in the hallway: "He said I sum up Minneapolis! It's my fault Minneapolis has no talent!"

Enough of the Odd Ones even though I know I left many out... there were a few good singers tonight. My favorite was Sarah Krueger who sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." The kid whose parents didn't come with him, 16-year old Matt Sato, was touching. As in past seasons, every backstory ended up a Hollywood choice. One I wasn't impressed with was Perla Meneses. I don't think flirting will keep her in the contest.

I liked how the sailors on the USS Ronald Reagan held their own "Reagan Idol" and sent the winner to the auditions... and he (Jarrod Fowler) made it onto Hollywood! He was pretty good, as was Michelle Steingas, Rachel Jenkins, and Denise Jackson. As always, they didn't show all going on to Hollywood.

Tomorrow night's auditions will come to us from Seattle and it looks like we'll have many new additions to the Notable of the Odd. As for the decent ones, I personally hope Simon comes up with something better than "I think people will like you." Was does that mean? Does he not like them?

So, what did you think of the show?