'The Apprentice: L.A.' - Ep. 2 -or- "How to tank a show in two episodes"

I think the 24 fans had a better TV night than Apprentice fans. At least, I hope they had a better time than this Apprentice fan. I should speak for myself, after all.

Here's the idea - move the show to Los Angeles, go more shallow than need be, send a team of mainly women to the Playboy mansion as an exciting reward, talk about how great your body is, think pink, and call it a show. The great body bit was Trump. He's known for his abs and pecs, right?

This season is seriously flawed and it's just the second episode! Now, I know I watched the premiere. In that premiere, the teams had no names. I know they didn't. The caption on the screen referred to "Heidi's team" or "Frank's team." Tonight, with no discussion, the teams suddenly have names as if they had them all along. What's up with that? Heidi's team is Kinetic while the losing team is named Arrow.

When the teams met Trump and the Trumpette (Ivanka) at Palisades Park, what the heck was with Ivanka? She looked all goth-gone-Beverly Hills with a with an odd black outfit and raccoon make-up. The task this week was to design, manufacture, and model a bathing suit line for Trina Turk. It wants to bring the Valley Girl out of me. Oh, the task itself is very "California" and it's technically a challenging job. But to saddle the winners with a trip to the Playboy mansion and a meeting with Hugh Hefner? Gag me with a spoon... please.

On the Arrow team, Nicole became the Project Manager while Heidi retained her position on the Kinetic team. Just like last week, it was very obvious which team was having problems. On Arrow, Carey threw himself into the task; he always wanted to design. Michelle spoke up against his teensy pink bikini brief shorts for men, and the guys on the team rolled their eyes, too. But Carey was adamant and persuasive. Carey, who's gay, was obviously thinking the gay market, but not the big picture. And, the mens' suit line is what killed their bid to win the task.

It's off to the boardroom for Arrow! And, off to the Playboy mansion for the overwhelmingly female Kinetic team. Oh, joy, joy... bunnies everywhere, with their little ears and tails, and Hugh telling his rags to riches story to anyone who'd listen. Don't get me wrong. I respect his success, but he's not someone I'd kowtow to, not at all.

One point I made last week was actually brought up while at the mansion. I said that the new "twist" of the Project Manager remaining the same on the winning team didn't give the others on the team the chance to shine. Sure enough, almost the same words came from Marisa while at the mansion. Envy is growing roots.

In the boardroom, Carey tried to put the target on Michelle (who is the only one who really spoke up about not liking the teensy suit). When polled by Trump, most thought Carey was responsible for the loss, with a smattering of Michelle and one vote for the Project Manager. Trump made it clear it was the teensy pink suit which killed their chances to win, but thinks his own body is so great that he could get away wearing it just like Carey did while modeling it on the runway. Yeah, right. Carey actually did look good in it. Just the thought of Trump's pasty skin against the pink is frightening to me, say nothing about the teensy factor. (Take that as you will.)

Nicole chose Michelle and Carey for the boardroom, but it was obvious that the firing choice was actually between Nicole as PM or Carey because he designed and pushed the suit. In the end, it was "Carey, you're fired." I kind of wonder how he would have done if he stayed longer. And, though I get the reasoning, I think that Nicole should have done more to control the team. Michelle and others definitely didn't care for the suit and she turned a blind eye to them.

Just a few random notes to end this:

• I'm going to keep a running tally of how often Frank says the phrase "at the end of the day." Last week he said it three times, this week once.
• When Frank told Trump he had to sleep outside because he's claustrophobic, Trump replied, "Don't worry about it. You'll be back in the Bronx very soon anyway." I guess he's out of the winning picture, eh?
• Trump actually said the words, "I have a great body." Feh. If he had said, "I have a great ego" - well, that would be believable.
• Next week some sort of "ultimate bombshell" is supposed to happen in the boardroom. Okay, save the show Trump Boy!

Dollar bills, y'all...

TV Newsy Bits - Sunday, January 14, 2006

What a night it's going to be for true television fans tonight, eh?

NBC has a new Deal or No Deal airing at 7 PM ET/PT, then a new Grease (whatever - that's something which is very low on my interest scale), followed by The Apprentice: L.A. (which I'll be recap/reviewing late tonight) and wraps up the night at 10 PM with the return of Crossing Jordan. I used to watch that show, but it's been gone so long I fear I forgot what last happened on it.

At 8 PM ET/PT, there's the highly anticipated by many two-hour season premiere of 24 on FOX. Another two hours will follow tomorrow night starting at 8 PM ET/PT.

CBS has new episodes of Cold Case and Without a Trace starting at 9 PM ET/PT. ABC is airing new episodes of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Desperate Housewives, and Brothers & Sisters for its evening primetime block. And, don't forget - if you're a Jay Leno fan, he's a guest on HGTV's Living with Ed tonight at 10 PM ET/PT. We've gone from famine (repeats) to an overwhelming feast of new shows... and I'm just talking about a few networks.

In other TV Newsy Bits:

• Not having HBO with my cable, I've missed a show I keep hearing about - The Wire. I caught an episode of it last night on BET. It immediately snagged me. It's created and written by David Simon, the writer who's responsible for Homicide: Life on the Street. It's that same rough edge Baltimore he knows so well. I chatted with him once at the New York is Book Country Book Fair. I like his books. Now I like The Wire.
• CBS has an article in which Matthew Fox (Lost) talks about his dark side. [I'll refrain from discussing my own dark side for the sake of the general public.]
• The New York Post has an article about wild times in the depravity dorm of American Idol. Heh.

Pants for Progress - This Week on 'The Late Show with David Letterman' - Jan. 15 - 19, 2007

Goodness, they've changed the official website for the Late Show with David Letterman, mostly for the better. But, instead of faulty listings of the upcoming guests, they now have extensive video clips and such available for the past week's guests. Since they didn't even list Madonna on their upcoming guests last week, maybe they're better off to just focus on recaps from the past week.

As for me, it's off to the TV listings to see whom I'll be seeing on the show this week.

• Monday, Jan. 15: Actress Amy Sedaris, magician Jason Randall and, get this, the musical guest is America with Ryan Adams. The show sounds interesting - I like Amy Sedaris. And, though I thought them to be defunct, America (if it's roughly the same group) was a part of my growing-up music. Somewhere around I have them on vinyl... or maybe 8-Track. ;-)
• Tuesday, Jan. 16: Actor Paul Newman, racing star Sébastien Bourdais and Diana Ross is the musical guest. I don't know about the race car driver, but I surely want to see Paul Newman and, to a lesser extent, Diana Ross.
• Wednesday, Jan. 17: Ohh! Terri and Bindi Irwin (Steve Irwin's wife and daughter) are scheduled. No one else is listed, but I'm sure they won't be the only guests for the evening. Dave is great with kids and Bindi is a neat little girl, so this should be another fine show.
• Thursday, Jan. 18: Actor Harry Shearer is the lone guest listed. Um. Okay.
• Friday, Jan. 19: Dan Rather, actress Tricia Helfer and musical guest Todd Barry performs.

Well, I'm more impressed by the shows through Wednesday night, but it's an all-new no-repeat week on Letterman.

And, that's a good thing indeed.

'Survivor 14: Fiji' - The Castaways, Part 2

Are you ready to learn more about the next five castaways we'll see on Survivor 14: Fiji? And, but of course, my impressions of them? I'd love to read your first take on them in the comments, too!

I'm listing the castaways male/female/alphabetically as I go along and the first five were explored in this entry. I'm looking at the official CBS Survivor 14: Fiji website and gleaning information from their bios and favorite lists. Let's see if I can get a true handle on the upcoming excitement before the season premiere on February 8 at 8 PM ET/PT!

Here's the second group of five, this time leading off with a woman (roar):

Although she lists her home as Los Angeles, Jessica is originally born and raised in New Orleans, LA. She attended Millsaps College in Mississippi, the University of New Orleans, and Tulane University... yet no degree is listed for her.

Currently working as a fashion stylist and make-up artist in California, from her bio page: "deBen describes herself as ambitious, warm and unbreakable. Her hobbies include portrait painting, jogging, hiking, kayaking, biking and eating pancakes at The Griddle Café."

She's currently single and her birth date is April 25, 1979. [I wonder if all these "currently single" folks weren't always single.]

Heading to her Favorites list to get the real skinny on her:

• She lists Pac-Man in her video games, as well as X-Box. Maybe there's a resurgence in Pac-Man that I just don't know about. Another Monopoly player - must be a prerequisite or that's one of the only board games folks can come up with under pressure.
• At least she mentions Survivor as one of her favorite TV shows, as well as A&E True Crime and VH1's Fabulous Life Of...
• Heh, her music choices are foods! Red Hot Chili Peppers and Black Eyed Peas! (Yes, I know they're not really foods.) She also likes Aaron Neville.
• Leaning towards women authors, she lists Ayn Rand, Daphne Moore, and Anne Rice. Hmmm...
• Her favorite snack foods are fairly healthy choices (rice cakes and SmartFood popcorn), but she lists good junk food, too.
• Non-alcoholic beverage is Kool Aid Tropical Punch Sugar Free? I believe that's a first that Kool Aid has made the list.

Okay, my take on her... I can't put my finger on it, but I think Jessica could be a contender. Winner of it all? I don't know. She's familiar with the show, which isn't the same for some of the others this season. And, something is just telling me she's a pretty tough gal. Of course, I could be totally off-base. I guess we'll see!
Now, if I were a young man named Andria, I think I'd want to be called "Dre," too. I try to keep in mind that John Wayne's real first name was Marion.

Dre seems to be the "school of hard knocks" graduate in this season's cast. Growing up homeless in the projects (despite the fact that seems a bit contradictory) of Wilmington, North Carolina, Dre turned to sports and cheerleading. He's also into boxing, basketball, stunting (?), tumbling, and more.

From his bio page: "Herd describes himself as humorous, energetic and intelligent. Describing his perfect day, he says, "When everybody is happy all day... that's a perfect day."

Although he seems to be single, he's the proud father of two boys - aged 2 and one-month old. The younger may have aged by now. His birth date is December 15, 1981.

Onto his favorites to see the "real" Dre:

• Oh, a chess player. A strategical game which involves thinking many moves ahead. That's a good game for a Survivor contestant to enjoy.
• Another clean linen aroma lover.
• He lists Underdogs as his favorite sports team. I'm thinking that means he roots for the underdogs. They aren't an actual team of some sport, right? I'm not always the most knowing when it comes to sports.
• He does not list Survivor as his TV show choice - only Seinfeld.
• Shel Silverstein and Stephen King make his authors list.
• Yet another Fruity Pebbles eater.
• Water is his favorite non-alcoholic drink. He listed no favorite alcoholic drink.

Oh, my. I'm really not sure of his chances. He has some interesting favorites, but he's not a fan of the show itself. Will that hurt his chances? Or, perhaps, maybe it's better to go in fresh? Although he's the "hard knocks" entry, I get the feeling he's on the upbeat side, not bitter. He's a cheerleader, after all. He's athletic, enjoys being happy, and likes chess. I think he could possibly make it far - after all, he survived the mean streets, what's Fiji but a new challenge? Save the cheerleader; save the world. (Yes, I want my Heroes back!)

Liliana grew up in Oxnard, the second eldest of eight siblings. (How much do you want to bet she got stuck babysitting a lot?) When she was 11, she lived a year in Guadalajara, Jalisco, exploring her cultural roots.

She served the country in the Marines for eight years and also worked with handicapped children. Although currently a loan officer, she would like a future in entertainment.

From her bio page: "She describes herself as strong, stubborn, confident, goofy and a witty gal. She is most proud of her sense of family and her burning fire for life." She's single and her birth date is April 5, 1981.

Peeking into the inner psyche of her Favorites list:

• No favorite games listed at all. Hmmm... maybe a Marines thing?
• She enjoys hiking and playing soccer, softball, and football.
• Yet another castaway who doesn't list Survivor at all in her TV shows. She enjoys Heroes, Oprah, and MTV3.
• I think she may have the record for saying "no favorite" in so many categories.
• Chocolate chip cookies and Gatorade make her list, as do Mojitos, wine, and tequila.
• V for Vendetta is her favorite movie while she lists no authors or books.

Well, I just don't know. She's definitely a tough woman. You can't be in the Marines for that long worried about breaking a fingernail. She likes Heroes (which, to me, is a plus). But how well does she know the people-manipulation aspect of Survivor? I think that's what will make or break her on the show. I'm sure she could handle any challenge thrown her way, but the interaction may do her in.

Although his name is Earl, he's nothing like the character in that television show. He's also not a native of California even though it's listed as his home. Earl was raised in Kansas City, Kansas. He went onto the University of Washington in Seattle and received a National Scholastic Achievement Award, then relocated to California.

From his bio page: "He also enjoys playing chess, hiking, watching movies, billiards and playing basketball. He considers himself to be very intelligent, creative, athletic and confident, with a witty sense of humor. He is a member of the American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers (ASCAP)." Yet another April birth date (so far, the majority have been born in that month, but it could be the luck of the draw in how I'm listing them) - April 9, 1971. He seems to be single with no children.

Hitting his Favorites for more insight:

• Ah, good... a multiple choices lister. None of this "no favorite" or one-word answers to everything.
• He lists many games, both video and board. Gamers tend to think ahead to make their moves.
• Once again, no Survivor listed in his TV choices, though he lists Grey's Anatomy, The Wire, Family Guy, and Curb Your Enthusiasm. Hmmm... all good choices, but no Survivor?
• The Bible is one of his favorite books.
• Yet another Fruity Pebbles eater. [I don't think I've ever eaten Fruity Pebbles in my lifetime. Is it that good? Where are the Coco Puffs fans?]
• Pom juice? Whazzat? Pomegranate, maybe?

What do I think of Earl? He seems a very intelligent guy, but he's yet another who may not be all that familiar with the politics of the show. Although he's a successful businessman, he might find out he's not in Kansas anymore. He's one I'll have to hold off my guessing on until I see him in action on the show. Something is telling me he might play the people a bit wrong and that could lead to an early boot. Prove me wrong, Earl.

I'm getting tired of typing "Los Angeles." All I can think is that they must have done some heavy recruiting in California. But, knowing that I used to live in the Los Angeles area and I was never really "from" L.A., keeps my faith alive.

Sure enough, Lisi is originally from Miami and spent time living in New York City, too. She has a rather interesting job - a customer service rep for a psychic service company. Huh. I wonder if there's really a need or do the psychics predict customer service issues and pro-actively solve them?

From her bio page: "In her spare time, she enjoys hiking with her dog. Her favorite sport is tennis. She describes herself as creative, intelligent, smart, observant and fun. She believes her resourcefulness and humor will help her do well on SURVIVOR." She's single, living with her Scottish terrier, George. Her birth date is June 9, 1970.

Checking her Favorites:

• She likes Pac-Man. [It must be a new fad of retro-games, I guess. I've been playing Millipede and Pong lately. I should stop fussing.] Her board game choice is retro-back-to-childhood, CandyLand.
• Her favorite outdoor activity is "hiking with dogs." That sounds like some sort of nature movie on Animal Planet.
• Again, Survivor is not listed as a favorite TV show! She only mentions Breaking Up with Shannen Doherty. [Feh.]
• No favorite books, but likes magazines listing Wired, Newsweek, and The Economist.
• Kashi cereal and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups both make her list.
• She gave a lot of one-choice answers.

For some reason, I'm finding her a bit perplexing just looking at the available information. She's probably not all that familiar with the show and I'm just not getting great vibes on her. I could be wrong, but I predict an early boot. No, I'm not psychic.

Stay tuned for the next five castaways! And, of course, please feel free to share your first takes on these folks, too!

'Survivor 14: Fiji' - The Castaways, Part 1

Phew, my source was spot on. I panicked last night when I couldn't find anything anywhere about the Survivor 14: Fiji castaways set to be revealed this morning on The Early Show. And, then they were there. The official CBS Survivor website has also been updated with photos, interviews, and other neat information. The premiere is Thursday, February 8 at 8 PM ET/PT.

I'm taking a peek at each of the new castaways, but there are too many for one entry. I decided to break things down to the old boy/girl/boy pattern alphabetically. Although this entry may look very heavy in one ethnicity, it's a diverse cast and the luck of the boy/girl/alphabetical draw. Once I get the cast entries all together, I'll link them to each other... maybe even list them on the sidebar for easy reference. It'll take me a few days to get them all listed. Any predictions I'm making here are based solely on their bios and it's very possible I'm totally wrong.

The First Five Castaways

Although he's now living in Los Angeles, Alex is originally from Columbia, South America. Ohhh, a Harvard Law degree and a member of the Harvard Boxing Club.

From his bio page: "He enjoys boxing, running, basketball, weight-lifting, painting and yoga. He recently spent a week climbing Mt. Whitney. He describes himself as assertive, witty and personable."

He seems to be single (no spouse listed) and his birth date is April 20, 1978.

But, to me, the real dirt comes out in the Favorites list on the bio page. Here are a few things which caught my attention:

• Under "scents" he listed laundry soap. [Is Survivor going to be the right place for that?]
• He lists Survivor, as well as Entourage and Family Guy, in his favorite shows. [If I were on the show, I'd certainly list it, too!]
• Rocky III made his movie list, not surprising in view of his boxing.
• His literature choices are intriguing - The Count of Monte Cristo and The Alchemist.
• While his cereal choice is very healthy (Smart Start), his junk food choices are Cheez-Its, Oreos, and KitKat bars. I like his junk food.

My overall thoughts? Attorneys historically don't do well on the show. He seems in good physical shape and, without a doubt, he's a smart man. His chances will most likely depend on being not perceived as a threat and his people skills. I give him a "maybe" as far as making it well into the game.

Unlike many who list Los Angeles as their home, Cassandra was born and raised there. She has been employed by the University of California for 23 years. Currently she manages the Civil and Environmental Engineering Department. Very impressive indeed.

From her bio page: "Franklin's hobbies include skiing, traveling and shopping. She describes herself as fun, warm and giving. She is very proud of her family..."

She's very involved in many worthy causes and her love of family really shines in her bio. She's roughly still a newlywed - married two years to husband Clif. Her birth date is April 19, 1964.

Checking out her Favorites:

• Interesting... while others answer with many words, most of hers are a single word. I'm sure that says something about her. Reserved? Basic? I don't know.
• She likes Monopoly (board game choice) and Pac-Man (video game choice). Monopoly often makes the board game choice, but many of the castaways are often too young to truly appreciate Pac-Man. Or, if older, they've gone onto more current games. Hmmm...
• She likes home decor and cooking TV shows, but doesn't list Survivor or any show by name at all.
• She likes all snack foods, but has no favorite alcoholic drink.

Well, I'm not sure what to make of Cassandra other than she sounds like a really nice woman and a good person from the heart. She likes to ski, but doesn't seem really into outdoors endeavors. Although anyone who likes all snack foods should have some spunk, I don't think she'll make it far into the season - perhaps midway?

Anthony was born and raised in Compton, then headed to Yale in New Haven, CT. While at Yale, he participated in plays and sketch comedy shows. (Yes, Survivor could use a comedian.) His current job is finding expert witnesses for court trials.

From his bio page: "Robinson enjoys gaming--live action role-playing (dressing up in costumes and reliving an era or genre), video games and poker. He also enjoys dancing, juggling, roller hockey, watching movies and creating his own movies. He describes himself as friendly, dorky and intelligent."

Anthony is single and his birth date is June 25, 1974. Oh, but what about his Favorites? What will they reveal?

• True to the form of most castaways, he lists multiple choices.
• He likes video games. He really does. And we're not talking decades-old Pac-Man.
• Survivor, Lost, and M.A.S.H. make his TV list. [Good choices, I say!]
• Singing in the Rain made his movies list, amongst others.
• He's a Twinkie eater, but can be forgiven for that because he also likes Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
• He likes Pringles. [Pringles is often a sponsor of the show. They'll like that.]
• Nice music choices including jazz and old school R&B.

Now, unless he's clowning around too much, I think I'm going to like this guy. Or, at least enjoy watching him on the show. Any guy who can describe himself as "dorky" usually is nice. His chances? I think he might do pretty well. I'm not getting Sole Survivor vibes from reading about him, but I don't think he'll do too shabby.

Erica was born in Lake Charles and received her Bachelors in Mass Communication from Grambling College in Louisiana. After college she moved to New Orleans, but Hurricane Katrina forced her to relocate back to Lake Charles, then to Baton Rouge.

From her bio page: "She describes herself as subtle, confrontational and outgoing. Her hobbies include writing, reading and spending time with her family. Her favorite sports are football and soccer."

Note the word "confrontational." That could be entertaining! She's currently single and her birth date is December 11, 1979.

Her Favorites should give some insight:

• She should get together with Alex - she likes the smell of fresh linen. [I'd be so weird if I were to do this favorite list - scents would be cookies baking, autumn leaves burning, coffee brewing.]
• She has no favorite video game, but lists Monopoly like so many others.
• Under both Sports and Outdoor Activities, she lists the same things - soccer and jogging.
• Survivor did not make her TV list. Forensic Files and Flavor of Love did. [Set your red flags now.]
• What's in a Ketel One Dirty Martini? That's her favorite, but I'm so not a martini drinker and I'm clueless.

I think I'm just confused by Erica. I have no clue how she'll do at all. She looks like she might be a tough contender. But she also doesn't seem familiar with the show and admits she's confrontational. I'll abstain from guessing exit or win until I see just how confrontational she really is.

"Me and you and a Survivor named Boo... travelin' and livin' off the land."

Boo was born and raised in Layfayette. He's a construction worker by day and manages the bar he owns by night. Not only that, but he used to be a crawfish farmer! He has a Bachelors from the University of Louisiana in Lafayette.

From his bio page: " He enjoys participating in mixed martial arts fighting and Olympic lifting. He describes himself as strong-willed, outgoing and adventurous. He considers himself to be a cerebral athlete, a great problem solver and strong both mentally and physically."

He's single (or they just aren't talking) and his birth date is June 21, 1972. His bio is short and to the point, hopefully his Favorites will tell us a bit more.

• Uh-oh. One word answers for the most part, like Cassandra.
• His favorite scent? FOOD.
• Another old video game favorite - Asteroids.
• When you link a few of his favorites together, it's an odd combination... The Shawshank Redemption (movie) and Queen (music). He likes Fruity Pebbles and Sports Illustrated.
• He's a milk drinker. Milk does a body good, y'know.

Well, well, well... other than the fact that he's a grown man called Boo, he looks like he could be a powerhouse on a physical level. That often doesn't help much with speed or balance challenges. Just looking at the bio, he seems a bit sheltered as far as being out and about in the world. Is he the male eye candy for the show? Will he make it to the end? I think he could make it quite a ways, but once again, I'm not getting Sole Survivor vibes.

So, there are the first five. I think it's going to be another interesting season!

Survivors ready?

Update: My take on the next five castaways.