Her name is Crystal
The fortune teller has come to life, this time talking. First she said hello to Porsche by name. Porsche screamed and called in Rachel. They both screamed and got everyone else in there.
The fortune teller told them first that one of them will be the winner of Big Brother. (Well, duh.)
Then she said she had premonitions and they would have to hear all of them to win HoH. She would laugh and they need to come running.
The first clue was about Shelly becoming rich with her 2018 book about how she has the perfect tan and you can too. It will make #3 on the all-time bestseller list.
Okay, she's laughing again ... in 2017, tired of the Miami heat, Porsche will move to Anchorage, Alaska and buy an igloo with an Eskimo named Ernie.
This is probably going to go on for most of the night and I have to get some sleep as I have to go to the doctor, then physical therapy in the morning. But I'll hang in for a while.
She laughed again.
In 2014, Jeff will disappear from society. He will last be seen wandering the Chicago streets muttering two words, "Clown shoe!" Be gone!
Laughing again ...
October 15 3:42 PM, Daniele will reconcile with her father Dick. On October 15, 3:49 PM they will go back to not speaking.
Laughing again ...
In 2014 in a sleep study after sleeping for 19 days straight and making national headlines, Kalia will get her dream job as a mattress and pillow tester.
Laughing again ...
In 2016 Lawon will take NY Fashion Week by storm when he launches his Handsomefied line of hats, ties and jackets.
Laughing again ...
After taking 9 years to earn his PhD, Brendon will shock scholars and physicians alike by finding the cure for an ailment that's been bugging him his whole life after discovering the cure for athlete's foot.
Laughing again ...
In 2020 Adam will file bankruptcy after investing his life savings in a line of bacon-scented heavy metal teddy bears for children.
Laughing again ...
In 2018 Rachel will give birth to a 9 lb 6 oz bouncing baby boy named Buki, Jr. after his proud father.
Laughing again ...
In 2012 Cassi will land a role alongside international mega-superstar David Hasselhoff in a remake of a countrified version of Baywatch, Riverwatch.
Laughing again ...
In 2015 Evel Dick will start a new tradition by bringing Christmas gifts to heavily tattooed orphans changing his name to ... old St. Dick?
Laughing again ...
.
Laughing again ...
In 2015 Keith will land a job hosting a new dating show called Love Rejection but it will be short-lived after it's revealed that he tried to date all 29 contestants.
She almost went into the next premonition but then the tape stopped and she told them to leave the parlor room. If I'm not mistaken, I think Jordan is the only one left now.
Laughing again ...
.
Okay, she went through all the hamsters. I hope it's over. On another note, Rachel just asked Jordan if she would reconsider her vote to keep Kalia. Jordan says it doesn't matter, she can change since she's sure Kalia will go whether she votes for her or not.
I'll be signing off for a while soon unless I hear the fortune teller laugh in next few minutes. Some of my Crystal quotes might not be perfect, but commenter FA has been transcribing them, along with the PT times and Crystal's good-byes for each one in comments. (Thanks, FA!)
MORNING UPDATE: No sleep for the hamsters as the fortune teller kept at it all night, repeating the fortunes already told. Rachel did sleep -- she can't compete in HoH and is strong on the fortunes from the first round. Adam seems the strongest with Jordan confused at times. Porsche and Kalia have a few things outright wrong.